Anal Probing. Or Marketing. Whatever.

The privacy and data ownership issues raised by the documentary Terms and Conditions May Apply are horrifying. 

Stunning information, really, in the sense that we've all agreed to this and blithely walked down a path without knowing the consequences. I'm gently tapping you on the shoulder now.

There's a lot to write about here. Civil rights, privacy. Fuck, just human decency in the age of The Corporation. It's a lot, but I'm focusing on how this clusterfuck might create an entirely new ecommerce model.

Third Party Doctrine

Perhaps the most chilling little frozen nugget of fear I got from this documentary was that 1st and 4th Amendments do not apply. 

EX: You need a warrant to come into my home and see what is in my medicine cabinet.

Truth: If I scan those prescriptions to be refilled at Walgreens, that data is now fair game once anyone subpoenas (arguably a much less challenging task) Walgreens for all data based on some fucked up Patriot Act loophole.

See where I'm going with this?

Your rights end when you click ACCEPT. 

Truth Marketing

I see a huge potential for ecommerce businesses to break out of this mold. If you are to buy, say, a bunny from me (I don't know), why do I really need legal protection? Why do you? It's a fucking bunny.

I see no reason to ACCEPT terms and conditions to simply transact or search or communicate. I hear you. eCommerce Business Person: "Protection from frivolous law suits?" How about you actually do good business and try not to be an asshole online? It's worked (for better or for worse) for millennia in the real world.

Did you know that your cell phone contract contains a clause that requires that you allow you to be wiretapped? I know. It does. It's insane. I'm backing off a little so that I don't sound like "that crazy friend" but I've researched it, it's true and you can, too. Look closely at your TERMS AND CONDITIONS and there is a clause about selling you down the river to "prevent" crime.

I call for a new generation of ecommerce standards. One that requires nothing more than an expression of interest. I know that once PayPal, Shopify or Visa run this through their "system" all bets are off on confidentiality. But I offer that ecommerce can put forth a model of NO DATA CAPTURE. 

I run several ecommerce sites and the prospect of someone getting pissed off at me sending them spam horrifies me. Personally, I am affronted everyday by deceptive and thinly cloaked scams. Can we say, as professionals, that it's enough? Can we step up and set an example? No one else is doing this. 

You Are Personally Vested

As an ecommerce professional, YOU, dear reader, are compelled to not be an asshole. I'm fairly savvy on this topic and I see us falling into suspect activity. There's a reason that the EU has implemented cookie regulation.

Which Brings Me to My Supermarket

I love my local Ralphs supermarket. It's gorgeous and filled with celebs and smells nice and safe and well lit and there's no chance of a slip n' fall or a surly butcher. Like many, I'm drawn by sales and offers based on being a "Ralphs Rewards" (no apostrophe, FYI, "Ralphs" is Kroger's southern California brand and thusly very laid back and ch'ellowing with you, dood) customer. 

Hell. Buy One Get One Free on laundry detergent? Hells yes. I'm a broke writer, buddy.

So what do they know about me? I don't know. I decided to inquire:

Christopher Karwowski <chris@cgkink.com>
2:10 PM (6 minutes ago)
to CustomerService
Hi,
I've received a phone call from Ralphs Customer Service that stated that the only data that you can show me is:

1. Rewards Points
2. Store #

I'm interested in exactly what is attached to my card, including ALL data. I'm assuming that you have a lot more than that stored.
To be clear, I'm asking because I am researching privacy and data collection issues. So I am requesting full disclosure. 

Would you be able and willing to help? 

cgk*ink

My original inquiry was very politely and professionally answered, What happened next was a little weird. I was called by Ralphs Customer Service. I never gave them my phone number. I'm sure it's on my profile but I never gave permission or asked them to do so. Odd. I'm pretty much sure that's stalking and since corporations are individuals, I'm hoping Ralphs is at least good looking.

Would they not put their data collection policy in writing? I'm trying again. I'm seriously hoping that they take this opportunity to make ecommerce and data collection policies that are friendly to the customer, not easy for the legal department.

I'll update as I get new information. I got my information! It's a 50 page PDF that lists everything that I purchased in the past year. Evidently, I like mushrooms. A lot. And chicken.

What's not shown are the metrics that are being used to hone my weekly offers and what that's based on.

See it all its data-driven glory here.